Generation 3, Chapter 9: Shadows of the past

I wish I had stayed within the safe confines of my mind, out of the way of reality.

Reality proved to be too much to handle.

The fact that I had been living in a dream stilled remained with me, but the truths I uncovered did not. I had no clue who the people around me were, or if they were to be trusted. Perhaps I was just caught in another dream.

But apparently, I knew them, very well, even.

Supposedly, I was married to Richard, Daniel and Darcy were my children, and Liam was a good family friend.

If that was indeed true, I would definitely remember it. Who on earth forgets that they have kids?

While my mind was wandering off to various philosophical topics, Richard and Liam were chattering a few feet away from me. I didn't remain oblivious to what they were saying. I knew their argument was about me, and what to do with me.

They weren't gonna include me, that much was clear. Wasn't I the one that would decide, in the end, what they should do about my situation?

Just because I can't remember them, doesn't mean I'm gonna let my life stand still.

"I'm still thinking we should let someone hypnotize her, force the memories back into her consciousness. It would be easy, wouldn't it?" Richard's strongly voiced his opinion. He was trying extremely hard to get me back. What if I didn't want that? What if I wanted to remain as I was?

"Ric, I know you want your wife back, desperately as well, but... Look at her. She doesn't even recognize what she meant to you. She might not want to be hypnotized. There's a very good reason why her mind would suppress memories. It won't be so easy as you think. It might be painful, and because of that... I'm sorry, Richard, but I can't agree to that." From what I could hear, Liam had to be a doctor, perhaps acting as a psychologist in his free time. He seemed to be a very reasonable man. I already liked his characteristics.

"I'd just like to point out that I can hear you two yammering on about trivial matters!" I hollered with a smile on my face, their heads turning to look at me in surprise. "Whatever you two are planning, I won't do it."

Richard sighed. "Listen to her... She's acting as if she's 25 again, like that day in the park."

"I CAN HEAR YOU!" I yelled again. He seemed to be a very insensitive person, not caring if I heard his words or not. Richard couldn't be my husband, not in this world.

"You might not want to antagonize her further... She's been through a lot," Liam re-entered the conversation, his voice soothing and aloof. "Perhaps I could talk with her for a while. Just talk, nothing more. That can't be too much of a problem, now could it, Amelia?"

Just a bit of talking? I would love to talk. Like he said, it couldn't hurt, now could it?

In fact, I was dying to pour out the contents withheld in my head and heart. The experiences I had lived through, even if it was all in my head.

I wanted to tell someone all about Chambray, how she was the one that was always nice to me, about Copper, who was hostile as first, but became a wee bit nicer as time passed by, and about the humans, who in the end, wreaked destruction.

But most of all, I wanted to tell someone about seeing Charlotte.

It couldn't be normal, seeing a dead person.

Normal people would have freaked out a long time ago.

I, on the other hand, was glad to have seen her one more time.

"Talking...would be nice," I answered quietly.

"Then that's settled," he exclaimed, then pointed at the gate in the fence. "Would you like to go for a walk? It would do you good to see some more of Lucky Palms."

"Where?" my lip pulled to the side, my mind confused by the words he had used.

"Oh, you don't know... Lucky Palms is the name of the town. It's where you've been living for the past fifteen years."

The number he gave me, was one that I had not been expecting.

That meant I had lost fifteen years' worth of memories, with little chance of regaining them.

"So...," I bit my lip as we started walking a path Liam chose for us. I had absolutely no idea where to start, or what I should ask questions about. Where I had had so many questions earlier, they all dried up as soon as the opportunity presented itself. To spare an awkward silence that was sure to follow, I voiced the first one that popped into my head. "What happened to me? I remember climbing onto the space shuttle and it launching... But the rest seems to be extremely unclear. There were two people with me... I just can't lay my finger on their names."

"You mean Shannon Brunson and Tyler Phipps?" Liam walked at a relaxed pace, keeping up with my rather sluggish pace. I was trying to enjoy the outdoors while I was allowed out from under their surveillance. "Those two scientists deserved what they got. They both died, unfortunately, but it was their fault. The shuttle was experiencing some trouble, yet they didn't report it. Because of that, the shuttle tumbled back to earth. You have no idea how lucky you were to survive it all. Fortunately, the craft wasn't too far from the ground. You were stuck in a part of the craft that had been the most shielded part."

"Shannon...Tyler... Weird," I stopped to figure out why it all sounded so familiar. "This might sound crazy, but... In the very realistic dream I was having, there was a Shannon and a Tyler persona. They ended up being the bad guys...sort of."

"That's not entirely weird. Your mind transferred what happened with you in real life into your dreams. As they were the ones that caused the problem, your mind perceived them as the 'bad guys', to use your exact words. You have no idea how much this fascinates me... Brain physiology always interested me."

Though our pace had been slow, we somehow managed to get as far as the primary school of this fair town. Liam gestured that I should take a seat, and I gladly complied. "There's so much to tell you," he sighed. "But I'm not the right person to tell you all of these things."

"Who would be the right person?" I asked, not really wanting to know the answer. I had a hunch to who it was.

"Richard, of course." No surprise there. "He's accompanied you through some hard times, Amelia. But he also shared a lot of happy times with you. You might not remember, but he does, and so does your children. It'll be next to impossible for him to not want to hold onto those. If he can't keep you with him, he'll take the next best thing: The memories."

"You make him sound like a saint," I grumbled, my gaze glued to the ground. "He acted like a real ass earlier."

"That's because he is like a saint, Amelia. He's a very kindhearted person, but he has a bad temper at times. You were frustrating him earlier. That tipped him over the edge. You also have to remember that he's desperate to get you back. I told him it could take time, lots of it as well, and that he has to be patient."

I turned my head towards Liam. "You're kindhearted as well, you should know. How come you and I never...you know? Became an item?"

That caused Liam to laugh. "Oh, God no. Richard is my best friend. I could never date a woman that he dated in the past. Besides, I was too...focused, back then. I hadn't thought of starting a relationship. And when I did, all the nice girls were already taken. Including you."

"So what you're saying is that...," I persisted with the topic,"if Richard and I had never met, and you and I were friends from the beginning... You would consider going out with me?"

He fell silent. "Perhaps," he answered, his voice barely above a whisper.

To many, the fact that I was looking around at other guys, while I was married (but having no recollection of it), would be astonishing, and most of all, disgusting. I couldn't help myself. Liam was just that attractive. Maybe because something seemed familiar about him.

It all clicked suddenly.

He resembled Copper.

Or more accurately, Copper resembled him. But Liam was the complete opposite of Copper, in appearance and personality. He was much more of a gentleman than Copper ever could be.

It all became too freaky after that realization.

"Would you mind if I went for a walk by myself? I need to think some things through," I excused myself, quickly standing up from my sitting position. The sudden change in position caused me to stumble, my face almost colliding with the hard and unforgiving ground, had it not been for Liam's quick reaction, catching my arm just in time.

"Eh, thanks," straightening the creases in my dress, I chose a direction at random, marching away from him.

"You're welcome!" he called back. From his voice, I knew he had to be smiling.

Walking around in heels proved to be a massive mistake, but to was too late to turn around. Instead, I walked on with the pain still poking in my feet, and ventured further into the town. It looked mostly deserted. Well, it was a desert town. It was to be expected.


Why I chose to live here, I still had no clue. I would have to inquire about that later.

The raw emotions that lingered were starting to take its toll on me. It was confusing every part of me, and I was unable to cope with it all. Not being able to take another step without crying, I sank to my knees.

I should have stayed at home and talked it out with everyone, instead of being stubborn and thinking that I could figure it all out by myself.

Though I hated admitting it, I needed help from other people.


There was no way for me to be able to piece the puzzle together by myself. There were parts that were hazy, others that were completely missing. I needed someone to help remake those pieces, to fill in those blank spots.


The question was, would I find them by staying with Richard, or by taking my chances and asking Liam for his honesty?

"How about you went with the option that didn't include any one of those two?" a voice asked. It had to be Charlotte again, but I couldn't see where it was emanating from. Wasn't the hallucinations supposed to stop after I had woken up? That is, if I was really awake and not still sleeping.


"Oh, you're awake, alright. You just keep asking for help, and I can't deny you that, so here I am, yet again!"


"I can't see you," I pointed out the obvious.


"It's the real world. I can't appear to you clearly anymore as I could before.  I'm here, but my image is really hazy. Sometime or another, I won't be able to help at all. But for now, I'm going to do what I can. The thing is, you've become reliant on other people. Don't be. You'll get burned, figuratively speaking. Be the strong person that I know you can be. That you always were."


As the wind blew the loose sand from the ground, along went the faint image of Charlotte, vanishing in between the sand clouds. Before she completely dissipated, I heard her whisper: "Even in death, I'll always look over you. I might not be in a physical form, but I'll be there, nonetheless."


I had a feeling that I had seen her for the last time.


But her words had given me hope, and the strength I needed. It also made me decide what I had to do.

The trip back to their house was quite an easy one. Taxi drivers recognized me instantly, waved me over and offered to drive me home. They were all so nice to me. What could I have done for them to deserve such treatment?


I found Richard seated in the dining room area, his head bent over his iPhone. Clearing my throat seemed to have caught his attention. "Sorry for disturbing your work, but there's something important I have to tell you."


"It's no problem," he put his phone away in his pocket. "I wasn't truly busy. Just checking my emails and such. Please, speak your mind."

His demeanor had completely changed. Liam was right. He had a quick temper, but in reality, he was a good, gentle person. It made breaking the news to him so much harder.


"Look...," I started. "I need time to sort my stuff out. Waking up and finding out that everything I thought was my life was a lie is pretty hectic. I'm sorry for not handling the situation like you would want, but if you really know me, you know that I'm stubborn. I figure things out for myself. And so, I've come to realize that... I need to move out of this place. I have to live by myself for a while, maybe even rebuild my life from scratch. By staying here, I'll be expected to live in a shadow, a shadow that no longer suits me. I'm positive that I will return one day, if only for the sake of Daniel and Darcy. However...it could take a very long time, Richard. Are you prepared to wait that long for me to come back to you?"

~♥~

You guys have no idea how much fun I had while writing this post.

It's weird, but writing this was so easy. The words just popped into my head.

Thanks for reading, and have a fantastic day!